I was going to actually wear a dress (gasp!) when I go to see Book of Mormon next week, but alas, that is not to be. When I went to see Lincoln last night, I fell down. My right knee has a scrape on it the size of an orange, with another cut down near my right ankle.
Today, all of me hurts. My knee, both ankles, my neck, my back, you name it. I have a disabled placard that I got before my fibromyalgia got better, which I usually do not use, but I did today. Walking is difficult.
I do this often. I have told people with some justification that I trip over thick air. I have tripped on cobblestones in St. Petersburg, Paris and Rome, and on the smooth sidewalks near my house. If there is a wrinkle in a rug, I will stumble. If there is a tree root in my way, I will fall.
The most embarrassing fall occurred at my twentieth Stanford Law reunion. I had to psych myself up to go to the reunion in the first place by telling myself that yes, I had actually graduated from this place and had as much right as any other graduate to be there. I had put on my best “I’m a lawyer, dammit” demeanor (it only gets trotted out on special occasions — usually when I am wearing pantyhose), and made my entrance into the wooden pavilion where breakfast was being served. I promptly caught my heel on the very small step from the ground to the floor of the pavilion, and landed flat on my backside. I was not hurt (and fortunately did not break my glasses), but my dignity was in tatters.
It was just as well. I felt deflated, and hence relaxed a bit, and probably had a better time talking to people because I was no longer worried about keeping up appearances. (It should also be noted that, when I went back for lunch, signs had been posting warning people about the step and encouraging them to watch out.)
I am not sure why I am so susceptible to falling. My hunch is that I have never mastered the skill of looking at all the world around me — much of which is quite interesting — and paying attention to my feet. Or I am intently talking to the people I am with: in the case of last night’s fall, I was too busy ranting to the Red-Headed Menace (complete with expansive hand gestures) about the misleading signs in the parking lot of Vallco Shopping Center to notice that the ground next to the sidewalk had eroded about two inches, hence making it ripe for me to step into, with less than optimal results.
If it is a choice between seeing what wonders are out there at eye level and above — birds, trees, buildings, sunsets, people — and risking tripping, I’ll take the world every time.
I just hope I do not break my neck one of these days.