I’m working on it.

A great quote from Sunny Anderson on Food Network, “I’m thankful that every day is another chance to get it right.”

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I’m sort of blue tonight.  Partly it is the rain which has been falling off and on all day. More than that, I am trying to find a solution for an ongoing issue, and the results of my introspection are leading me down roads I don’t want to go — but to places where I need to be in the end.  Mourning the aftermath of the decisions I haven’t quite made yet but which I can see are inevitable takes a toll on the psyche.

I need comfort food.

A little Sondheim is always in order: I’m listening to Sondheim! The Birthday Celebration.  It seems to be helping — surely more than watching the DVD of the last performance of Rent would. (Although Patti Lupone’s tendency to sing flat on “A Little Priest” does get on my nerves.)  Maybe after this, I’ll queue up A Celebration at Carnegie Hall.

Figuring out answers will just need to wait until tomorrow.

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Skyfall.

The Rocket Scientist and I flipped a coin over which movie we would go to see tonight, and I lost.  So instead of going to see Daniel Day-Lewis be grave and presidential in Lincoln, we went to see Skyfall. I liked it much better than I expected to.

I am not a James Bond fan — I generally only see the movies when dragged to them.  I was relieved that I ended up getting called out of Quantum of Solace because of a sick kid — at least I was once I ascertained that the kid was not really sick, but just very anxious, and I was able to calm him down.  I never did end up seeing the rest of the movie, which is fine by me.  From an earlier Bond era, A View to A Kill is one of the very few movies I have ever walked out of in my  life. I met the hoopla around the franchise turning 50 with a sincere “Who cares?”

I had no intentions of seeing Skyfall.

But I liked it.  In addition to suspense, which I expected, it had humor, which I did not.  There were also great actors (Judy Dench, Ralph Fiennes), eye candy (Daniel Craig, and the actor who played Q, not to mention London and Scotland, both wonderful places), and Javier Bardem, who seems to be making a career of being the most bad-ass villain imaginable.

My favorite line of the entire movie? “What makes you think it would be my first time?”  It doesn’t seem funny here, but in context it’s great.

In fact, I only had one gripe, because I am that person who nitpicks things to death. It doesn’t matter much, so I feel comfortable griping about it here, but in respect to people who get annoyed about spoilers, it is in a footnote behind a cut.  (If you’re reading in the RSS feed, sorry.)

So, in general, a very good movie.  I highly recommend it.
*Komodo dragons do not kill people as they are shown in the movie.  They bite their prey once or twice and then track it as it develops and dies from massive bacterial infections. Their mouths are cesspits of very nasty organisms — they’ll kill you, but they will take a couple of days to do so.

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Time to talk.

“The time has come,” the Walrus said,
“To talk of many things:
Of shoes–and ships–and sealing-wax–
Of cabbages–and kings–
And why the sea is boiling hot–
And whether pigs have wings.”

“The Walrus and the Carpenter,” Lewis Carroll

My friend Sarah treated me to Victorian High Tea at Tyme for Tea in Niles on Wednesday.  It was a lovely afternoon.

The sky was that cornflower blue that blesses us who live here in the fall, and although the hills had not yet turned from brown to green, the trees had turned from green to red.  Niles is a small town hidden away in the East Bay, lovely and quaint, if admittedly a bit kitschy.  The Niles Canyon Railroad runs from there, and I have sweet memories of taking small boys riding on a steam train through the golden hills on a November Saturday afternoon.

Tea was fun, and silly.  The tea shop has a chest of hats, so I donned a brown panama and selected a maroon cloche for Sarah.  We dined on fresh-baked cherry scones and lemon curd, tea sandwiches and petit fours, washed down with warm tea redolent of peach and ginger.

We talked.  We talked of work — hers ongoing and mine recently completed.  We talked of family.  We talked politics.  She commiserated with me over my frustration with recent health issues and meds side effects.*  I talked about the year, and how glad I was it was drawing to a close.    We talked about our plans to see The Book of Mormon, and she talked about having had to remind herself not to sing the songs out loud during her trip to Uganda.  We talked about how I had just started reading Cory Doctorow’s fiction (as opposed to his blogging), and how Nate Silver was, as she said, “adorkable.” We talked about how the sex workers in Amsterdam are unionized, and how legalization of behavior makes it easier to regulate.

We talked of our lives as they are, and our lives as we would have them be, and the world around us.

It is soul-filling to talk at length to friends whose approval I need not seek, whose disfavor I do not fear.    Not because they do  not matter — there are legions in this world whose opinion is of no consequence to me — but because they can be trusted to not judge me, or when judgment is inevitable (for who never judges?) to leaven it with love and compassion.  People who know my imperfections and accept me anyway.  Who like me anyway. And whom I like and respect in turn, regardless of their flaws, whatever those may be.

I am grateful to have friends like that. Some, such as Sarah, or Stephanie, live close to me.  Some — Cathy or Jennifer or Carol or others — are flung across the country (and soon, in Jennifer’s case, across the world).  I do  not have as many as I would like, or arguably need (I am a solitary and suspicious type, and people often have to work to get to know me), and I am far, far too bad at keeping in touch, but I treasure each one of them.

I need to tell them that more often.

We need to talk.

*Among other things, my hair is falling out.  No, I do not have cancer.

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It’s that time of year again…

Some people in my neighborhood still have the spiderweb decorations up from Halloween, while others have already put up their Christmas lights.

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Rachel Maddow on why all of us won Tuesday night.  It’s well worth watching all the way through, even if it is sixteen minutes long.  The best soundbite has been plastered all over Facebook, but her most important points come right at the end.

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It’s nice to go out on a high note.

As of 8:00 p.m. election evening, the moment the California polls closed, I once again became unemployed.

Over the past three and a half weeks, I have gained about $1,000, a water bottle, tote bag, and t-shirt (I won something in each of the office raffles) each proclaiming me to be allied with one union or another, none of which I actually am, three $25 gift certificates for working eight-hour shifts, and a fair chunk of experience in dealing with disgruntled people over the phone.

I have lost one purple Swarovski drop earring, and some naivete about the political process — not that I was all that naive before.

I worked with some wonderful human beings, but I once again totally failed to exchange basic information such as phone numbers or email addresses.  I did grab the email address of one of the supervisors, who promised us all references.  I also made a point of going to all the supervisors and thanking them for creating such a wonderful workplace:  given the type of work, it could have been horrible, and it was anything but.

Tuesday was by the far the best day I worked: no salesmanship, no explaining exactly how important raising the minimum wage in San Jose or the sales tax in Santa Clara County was, or why Jimmy Nguyen would make such a good District 8 Councilman.  All I did was call registered voters and remind them how important it is that they vote.  I could be happy and enthusiastic, and most often I had people thanking me for calling. I had more than one person tell me how important what I was doing was.

Given my deep conviction about the vital importance of electoral process, this was perfect.  As I told one of my supervisors an hour in, I was having fun.

One man awkwardly explained he was in fact in the polling booth as I called.  I forbore reminding him that he wasn’t supposed to have cell phones in there.  Another women defiantly said “I voted for Romney,” and was surprised and sheepish when I gently replied, “I don’t care who you voted for, ma’am, only that you voted.”  I had more than one person, recognizing the phone number as being that from which they had received numerous political calls over the past month, state before I had a chance to say anything “I voted already.” My favorite was a woman who explained that her son — the person I was calling for — had voted already, and went down the line listing the propositions and how she had told him to vote.  We were both laughing by the end of the conversation.

I laughed a lot, and smiled, and said “wonderful!” and “have a great evening!” and meant every word of it. One of the other staffers, a woman who had done this for many more weeks than I had, complimented me on my rap, and told me how genuine and pleasant I was.  I was flattered, and more than that, relieved. Being a torch-bearer for representative democracy is a role I take very seriously.

Like the census job in 2010, I felt that what I did mattered.  Of the five campaigns I worked on, three and a half were successful.  (One of the campaigns was for two candidates for city council, one of whom was elected, while the other was not.)  I helped make sure that education can be adequately funded in California, and that people living on the edge in San Jose can make something closer to a living wage.

Now the election, and my stint as a phone banker, are over. I think that I, and all the people who sat next me on the phones and computers, did a good — and important — job.

I’m sad to see them go, but happy things turned out so well in the end.

Posted in Politics, Work! | 2 Comments

I, and many political nerds across the land, have a deep and abiding crush on Nate Silver.  Not that he is ever going to read this, but thanks, Nate, for giving us intelligent and sane analysis.

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Chris Kluwe is saying goodbye to blogging, at least for now. : (

I understand why, and can only wish him good luck and Godspeed. And who knows, I may even be  moved to root for the Vikings occasionally.

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Why yes, I am high maintenance, at least these days. Sometimes.

I had a meltdown of sorts at work.  Not a  major meltdown. I just got upset at what I saw as a fundamentally unfair situation.

I had agreed to work eight hours.  Working eight hours ended up causing me problems, and a missed appointment fee to the tune of fifty bucks.  It was not my appointment, either, but somehow it was my responsibility.

I’m the mom, you see.  My responsibility, my fault, even though the individual in question had set up the appointment by himself and not told me when it was.  So I was stressed and upset going into the shift.

There were not enough computers to go around, so I and a lot of other people were reduced to using pre-paid cell phones to make calls.  The noise was immense, but I coped, and did the best I could.  Remember the esprit d’corps I mentioned?  I really do like the people I work with, even in the midst of noise and chaos.

Two hours before the end of shift, one of the supervisors took away all of the cell phones to give to volunteers who were coming in.  After much deliberation by the bosses, those of us using the phones were offered two options: continue to work using our personal cell phones, or go home early.  We would not be paid for the hour we went home early, of course, but they were going to give us the gas cards that they had promised people who agreed to work eight hours.

I had no option.  I do not have unlimited cell phone minutes. (I also did not want the people we were calling to have my personal cell number, but that is another matter.)  I was in a position where I was going to be forced to go home.  When I suggested that people who were on computers might be asked if they wanted to go home early, that was rejected as “opening up an entire new can of worms.”  I was clearly unhappy.  I did not yell, but I did complain.  I suppose if you pushed the point I committed insubordination.

The youngest of the bosses found a young woman who agreed to go home early.  And as it turned out, a number of the volunteers left after a short while, so people could go back to using phones.

I apologized to one of the bosses, but in my heart I am not sure I meant it.  It seems to me that you need to make better plans for people to be able to work when you tell them to show up.  This is not the first time this has happened: a few days ago I punted something that mattered to me, and which may have longer term implications,  so that I could work eight hours, only to be told when I arrived that plans had changed and everyone would only work five.  Had I known in advance, I could have shifted the time I work so as to take better care of my personal obligations.

I am pretty sure I have torched any chance of getting any sort of recommendation from any of these people.  Which is okay: the last job I would want to move into at this point is telemarketing. As I mentioned in my last post, I am resoundingly mediocre at this.

I just regret letting my emotions get the better of me.  It was unprofessional.  I know better.  I almost always behave better.

It is towards the end of a long year.  Having a job, for even a few weeks, was a bright spot, and now it is almost over.  This saddens me immensely.

Pain.  Loss.  Endings.

I need joy and beginnings.  And soon.

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Being a phone banker  has been an… interesting … experience for me.

I like my bosses, who do a good job of maintaining morale.  I like my coworkers, and the esprit d’ corps which we have seemed to have created for ourselves.

It’s just that I quite frankly suck at this job.

Not bad enough to get fired, but I am certainly resoundingly mediocre.  What saves me is my work ethic: I show up early every day, only leave my station during official breaks, never leave before we’re let go.  I work as hard as I can.  I am sweet and helpful and… only marginally competent.

And, unfortunately, with only two more days to go, I am not going to have time to develop any sort of basic mastery of good telemarketing technique.

I hate that.  I need to be, if not the best at everything, then certainly good at it.  And I’m not, and won’t be.

There is precedence, sadly: I was not a particularly good lawyer, either, expensive law school education notwithstanding.

Posted in Work! | Tagged | 1 Comment

*rimshot*

Yesterday, The Red-Headed Menace said that in his AP American History class they were watching “The Civil War.”  He has recently watched “Jazz,” and I just got through watching “The National Parks.”

When I suggested that this evening we watch “The Civil War” so that he could review, he stated that he was “Ken-Burnsed out.”

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My votes

 I am going to indulge myself in a bit of pontification here.  Not that it probably matters to anyone, but here is how I am voting on all major California races and propositions:

President, Vice President: Barack Obama and Joe Biden. Quite frankly, the Republican vision of America and the world scares me.  There are a lot of things Obama has done — or failed to do — that I have been unhappy about, but given that all of politics is a compromise between the ideal and the achievable, in many ways he has done much more than most of us really should have expected. I realize that I am in the bluest region in a very blue state (taken as a whole — the Central Valley and other rural regions run red), and so my vote in the Presidential race means little, but I am still not going to vote for a third party candidate.  I would hate to have a situation like 2000, where the candidate with the most popular votes loses in the electoral college.  It would embolden those in opposition, and make it even harder to get anything done for the next four years.  Given that there is sure to be at least one SCOTUS appointment in that time, offering as much support for Obama as possible matters.

U.S. Senate: Dianne Feinstein. Sigh.  I am no fan of Feinstein.  I was not impressed by her opponent’s candidate statement, however, and even had I been so I would still vote for the incumbent.  Numbers matter here, and having as many Democrats in the Senate as possible is important.

Proposition 30, increase in income taxes and sales taxes:  Yes. The state needs the money.  We are in dire financial straits.  Failure to pass this would result in state spending reductions, primarily to education.  Given the way that Prop 13 has gutted the best public schools in the country over the past three decades, this is a necessity.  (Also, if I’m looking at supporters versus opponents, The League of Women Voters versus the Howard Jarvis Taxpayers Association? No contest.)

Proposition 31, “State Budget, State And Local Government. Initiative Constitutional Amendment And Statute”: No. Because of its two-year budgeting requirement, it would add inflexibility to the state budgeting process. It would also result in a loss of tax revenue to the tune of $200 million annually.

Proposition 32, alleged political campaign reform: This one deserves its own post, but no, no, no. It’s deceptive and unfair.

Proposition 33, auto insurance rates: I admit, I have not read enough about this to have a clear idea about it, so as it stands now, no.

Proposition 34, repeal of the death penalty: Yes.  That I should be firmly in support of Prop 34 should be no surprise to anyone who knows me.  In fact, out of all the propositions, this is the one I feel most intensely about.

Proposition 35, human trafficking: No. I am extremely wary of creating or changing criminal laws — especially ones that increase the penalties for behavior as much as this one does — by the initiative process.  (Also, the definition of “Commercial sex act” (“sexual conduct on account of which anything of value is given or received by any person”) seem to me as being overbroad. ) The requirement of Internet registration is unwieldy, and given the nature of the Internet, allows for the possibility of abuse.  (And yes, I do understand that that my opposition to Prop 35 is  inconsistent with my support for Props 34 and 36.)

Proposition 36, penalties under the three strikes laws: Yes.  The three-strikes law was flawed from its adoption by initiative in 1994, and has been misused.  Prop 36 fixes the worst of it.

Proposition 37, GMO labeling requirements: No.  A very wise law professor once told me that if the consequences of a proposition are at all vague, regardless of how good it looks, vote against it.  Prop 37 — the Genetically Engineered Food Labeling Initiative —  has the potential of being a mare’s nest.  It could be the food equivalent of the posting requirements of Prop. 65, costing businesses and consumers a lot of money without actually giving people choices.  The whole area of food labeling needs to be handled on a federal level. You want to argue that the FDA and USDA are owned lock, stock, and barrel by Monsanto?  Okay,  but that is where the fight should be.  This leaves aside the entire scientific question of whether GMO foods are at all harmful. The argument that “people should make up their own minds” does not carry much weight with me, since most people are susceptible to scare tactics.  Using litigation as an enforcement mechanism also bothers me.

Proposition 38, tax to fund early childhood education programs:  No. I object to Prop 38 even though it aims to raise income taxes the same as Prop 30 does.  Firstly, the increases start at $7,500 rather than $250,000.  More importantly, though, passing this will do nothing to prevent the automatic five billion dollars in education spending cuts that will occur if this gets more votes than Prop. 30.

Proposition 39, business tax treatment, clean energy fund:  This particular proposition drives me crazier than the others.  I like the changes in tax treatment for businesses — I think that basing taxes on the amount of in-state sales makes a lot of sense. But that money needs to go into the general fund, not be locked into particular  projects. It’s a yes, but a reluctant yes.

Proposition 40, referendum on State Senate redistricting: Yes.  The districts drawn by the citizen’s commission are fair and reasonable.  There is currently no opposition to the measure, the opponents having withdrawn following the State Supreme Court having ruled that the districts were to be kept in place for the 2012 election, so voting no seems silly.  I am interested in finding out the backstory, though: apparently the proposition was put on the ballot by people hoping it would be defeated, thus invalidating the districts drawn by the commission.  It never occurred to me that someone would put a measure on the ballot in order to force a “no” vote, but now that I think about it, it makes sense.

There are a host of county and local measures and races, but I am going to skip those.  (Most people who read this would not care whether Santa Clara County passes a one-eighth a penny sales tax, or renews an existing parcel tax for clean water management, or about the people running for school board or city council.)

So, if you are in California, how are you voting?

Posted in Politics | 3 Comments

I just broke one of my own rules: I argued about vaccination with an anti-vaxer on Facebook.  Vaccination issues (and the vaccination opponents) are one of those topics that it is wise for me to avoid in person and online, because I can get nasty.  I managed to be civil, demonstrating the flaw in her argument and backing up mine with statistics from the World Health Organization.  Of course, the fact that she is a friend of mine helped in that regard.

Go me.

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Two more posts from Chris Kluwe

Panem et Circenses: about the moral bankruptcy of our current economic system; and Matthew 22:39: an open letter to the Archbishop Neinstedt and Pope Benedict about acceptance and tolerance of lesbians and gays, using actual quotes from the New Testament to support his positions.

I find both well worth reading, even though I have heard similar opinions expressed by other people.  Some truths need to be repeated frequently.

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