It isn’t as though it was ever easy.
The things in the rear-view mirror
always appeared larger — and clearer —
than any of us ever want to admit.
We’re human. Humans crave certainty.
We crave surety and simplicity, and not having to think too hard,
too badly.
The way a junkie craves meth. The way a drunk craves alcohol.
We carry that craving even though we recognize
that nothing is ever completely the way it seems,
that no one is all of a piece,
that seeking the easy way is bad for all of us.
I’m no different.
But, now,
we live in a world where the walls of the rabbit hole
close in in as they rush past our heads.
We fear the other:
other nations
other people
other genders
other races
other ….. Just other.
We look across the deepening gulf
and we can’t see well enough to
understand how we got here,
let alone how to bridge the abyss.
Someone (anyone?) needs to find the courage to jump.
No one seems interested enough to try.
God knows I’m not.
Even as I recognize that
my intransigence is a betrayal of my younger self
of whom I always thought I needed to be,
of beliefs that for so long mattered —
tolerance, understanding, generosity of spirit —
I’m done now.
All I can say is to hell with it.
To hell with THEM.
And I look across in the deepening gloom,
And see them saying the exact same thing.