It’s tough out here right now. I’ve been working on a list of ways to cope with the current insanity. I’m posting it here so I can find it easily. Here goes:

What to do:

Stop avoiding the news. Ignoring the situation will not make it any better. Sadly, object permanence means that things don’t just go away because we’re not looking at them.

Don’t wallow – that just leads to paralysis. Find good news sources and stick to them. (Sadly the Washington Post no longer fits that description, what with Jeff Bezos interfering with editorial decisions and what not. The NYT may not be reliable, though admittedly I am only keeping my NYT subscription for the games and the Arts section.) Set limits to how much time you spend reading news.

Confront the fact that there are limits to what you can do by yourself. The things in motion are bigger than you.

Confront the fact that changing things back will be slow – it takes a lot longer for a rock to be pushed uphill than it does for that same rock to roll down.

As the pin I have in my coat (and on my knapsack) says, “Embrace Hope.” (Thank you, Penzey’s Spices!) Despair clouds the mind and makes any action seem like walking through chest high mud.

Find out what you can do: Find the contact info for your representatives at the federal and state levels. Know who your county commissioners and city council members are. Know who sits on the local school board and county board of education. (While Trump and Musk are disproving the old adage that all politics are local, much of it still is.) There are a lot of things we can do to keep our localities good places to live. Call and write your elected officials frequently so they know that at least some of their constituents are paying attention.

Escape is good, and necessary, in small doses, but don’t spend all your time in 1920s Britain with Hercule Poirot, and other similarly enticing times and locations. That goes for both the television and the books. Especially don’t get so engrossed in a book that you stay up until 3 a.m. and trash your sleep schedule.

Recognize how you are privileged. In my case, in addition to the obvious (I’m a white, cis, woman), I have a secure roof over my head, the breadwinner in our household has been with the agency enough years to make them secure from being RIFfed (RIF=Reduction In Force, aka layoffs)(if the administration starts forcing retirements, he might be in danger, but we’ll cross that bridge when we get to it). Inflation will make life harder, but not desperate. 

If you are a praying person, pray.

Find sources of joy, even if they are little ones. Try to find happiness in the everyday.

Get your (physical) house in order: do whatever you can do to make the area around you cheerier. (Unfortunately, the one thing I would want to do – put out flowers – is not possible because the cats eat them. Most flowers are toxic to cats, and even roses, which are not toxic, can still upset their stomachs. The last time we put roses on the table, an hour later you could see teeth marks on the leaves and a few of the petals.)

Build bridges, and find community, online and IRL. Contact friends that you may have lost touch with. If you have drifted away from your faith community, find another. (It’s easy for me to say that; I’m a lapsed Episcopalian and before that a former Roman Catholic. Episcopalians (at least the ones I know) tend to have the same outlook as the Reverend Marian Budde of Washington’s National Cathedral.)

Call your mom, or your dad, or your siblings, or your kids. (Assuming that there are not reasons you are out of touch with them other than simply having a busy life. Obviously, if you cut off contact with them because they were toxic to you, that’s a different story.)

Take care of yourself. In my case, that means eating more healthy meals, and exercising to the extent I can (right now I am recovering from a wrenched back and the last vestiges of problems from a cracked ankle). Develop a regular sleep schedule.

Remember the Zen Buddhist proverb: “Before enlightenment, chop wood, carry water. After enlightenment, chop wood, carry water.” For “enlightenment” substitute “political stability and a safeguarded democracy.” Do what you need to do.

If things get to be too much, get granular: what do you have to do the next day? The next hour? The next minute? What is the next right thing?

And most of all…

Breathe.