Fear.

I fear.

I fear because I hope too much.

I fear because what I feel now feels like the hope I had in the September and October of 2016.  And we all remember — are reminded every waking moment of every day — what happened next.

I fear so much that sometimes my stomach ties itself in knots when I think of the state of the country, and where we are heading.

I don’t want to think of the Democrats winning the House. It is less threatening to believe in the status quo. Work to change it, yes, but don’t expect those efforts will bear fruit.

Too much gerrymandering. Too much voter suppression.

I hope. I despair. I am paralyzed by both.  Does this mean the bastards have won? Does this make me a “Good German”?

I honestly don’t know.

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